Dumb Girls with Dumb BFs

boysaredumb

“How do I tell my friend that she has abandoned me for some loser guy with no prospects and I am losing all faith in her…?”

-Anonymous
This question hits a little too close to home for me. I’ve been through a similar situation and, yeah, it’s hard. Your gut instinct should be to stick beside her no matter what, I mean, she is your best friend after all, but if it’s something that’s been going on for a while, you’re feeling betrayed and wondering if she’ll ever learn. My advice would be to sit her down and let her know how you feel. Put it ALL on the table, but also understand that this might not make a difference in the situation whatsoever, because she is her own person. You cannot make decisions for her, she’s a big girl, she has to make her own choices and mistakes. Keep this in mind, she’s not doing what she’s doing in spite of you. She’s doing it, because, in some twisted way, it’s bringing her happiness. Instead of judging her and condemning her for her actions, understand that she’s gotta do this for her. If she lived her life in order to please you, you wouldn’t want to be friends with her, because she wouldn’t be the person you fell in friendship love with, she’d just be an exact replica of yourself. Talk to her, I mean really talk to her, and let her talk as well. Even if you don’t understand why she’s doing what she’s doing, still let her know that you love her and you’re happy if she is. If it’s genuinely harming her in some way though, you obviously have to intervene on a more severe level, but that’s just because you’re an awesome friend, so go you.
Leslie Cole
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